As we age, our old friends are dearer and acquaintances become closer. When we travel, strangers respond to our open smiles and share their lives for an hour at dinner on a riverboat. They tell their stories from wheel chairs in airports and waiting in doctors offices. Now we can surmise their life stories from facebook and through other social media.
Recently at a sale, I ran into two girls/ladies/women that I knew from school. The two Cindys. And they are aging well. They were a year behind me in high school. We did not run in the same circles, and my friends and I considered them rivals of a sort for the attention of the available males in town. Their group - Cindy, Cindy, Nora, Carolyn, Jan and Becky-cruised the "ave" in a Cindys station wagon. As we passed on Myrtle Avenue, they were always having a good time. We were jealous of their good time and that they belonged together to something. Now I know that "something" just turned out to be a long lasting friendship of girls.
Over my years at Pepperidge Farm, I went to Cindy with my insurance problems. She was open and helpful to me, and I responded to her friendship. Then we worked a short time together in quality control, and we became better acquainted. I liked her and wondered at that jealousy of my younger years. I knew Carolyn from grade school at Steuben where we were buddies together with Ann and Kathy. Our daughters, Amy and Jennifer, were in school together and even in each others weddings . We crossed paths often and shared chatter about families. I never did get to know Nora. Jan worked at the hospital in registration where she occasionally had to help me. I think I offered friendly conversation, but she never accepted. That's okay. The same with Becky who also worked at Pepperidge. They did offer me respect though in the work positions we shared.
The two Cindys spoke their enjoyment of the recent get together of the group. They are still mourning the recent loss of Jan to cancer. I could feel their sorrow. It made me think of what a blessing it is to be able to share our lives with others and to empathize with the ups and downs of their life's journey. Jan will always be with them-not forgotten.
The second Cindy (now Cynthia) greeted me that day with a smile and received one of my never ending hugs. I cant help my hugging. Somehow, I sense that is what people need from me at certain times. Cindy told me she enjoyed seeing my pictures of children and grandchildren on facebook. I also follow hers and am able to show concern and attention to her family's trials and triumphs. Her joy in her grandchildren is evident. And concern for her aging parents is a path I know, and I feel in my heart what she faces. Cynthia also worked at Pioneer Rubber/ Sherwood/ Mapa when I did. She stayed on in a management position when Mapa made a move to Tennessee and still lives there. When my Mother passed, she was able to help me with a life insurance question. At that time, her kindness to me meant a lot. Even now, it makes me tear up. Cynthia also mentioned that she enjoyed reading my stories on my blog. Little did she know that she would be a character in one. And Cindy mentioned quickly my art and talent which is a recognition I appreciate. My goal here is to bring at least one smile.
Friendships can begin and end and rest awhile. Some are lifelong with wet and dry spells. They can be antagonistic and forgiving. I once did not speak to my best friend for over a year because of her use of the word hillbilly which I find very offensive. After a time, I was able to let it go, and she welcomed me back as if nothing happened. A lot did happen to me during that time and someday I will share with her. A high school friend moved away for nearly 20 years, but has returned and our relationship is better because of separation and experience.
People often say "I wish I knew then what I know now" and life would be different. Who can say different is better? We are led by God who sees every move and thought we make. And lets us learn and develop into loving beings to shine His light out to others in friendship.
Showing posts with label age. Show all posts
Showing posts with label age. Show all posts
Sunday, July 6, 2014
Friday, March 28, 2014
School Friends
School Friends
3/27/14
Yesterday I traveled to Lodi Ohio with Chris to meet Arlene for lunch. Both are high school friends that I have been in contact with occasionally since graduation. Our friendship was centered over our freshman and sophomore years.
After 6th grade at Steuben school, all the outlying students went to junior high at the high school on split sessions until the new junior high was completed. We were outsiders to town kids already familiar with each other and knew the established social hierarchy. My sixth grade friends were spread out over different class groups I now realized were arranged due to scholastic achievement. My best friend soon found a new town friend and was able to acclimate to the new surroundings. I think I never did. I don't remember any friends from 7th or 8th grade. My life was secret and I kept to myself for survival. Those memories are cold and gray and alone among the class mates who had money and privilege and made fun of my speech and my clothes and lack of social knowledge. The thing that saved me then was that I was smarter than most of them. And I had a family to go home to for awhile.
As a freshman, I remember that Arlene and I met in Mrs. Rineharts Algebra class and ate lunch together. After eating, we cruised the halls, flirting with boys we passed and those we could see through classroom door windows. In the winter, I did go to a few basketball games with her and did stay overnite once at her home on Ash St. My sisters could drive and thus I was able go to some school events. My parents both worked second shift at Pioneer Rubber and with one car, we were severely limited in after school and other social activities. Arlene never stayed the night with me. I knew my home was different from hers and was afraid of being judged again and maybe losing her friendship.
Anyway, the school year ended and we didn't see anyone from school over the summer. I worked at Holthouse Bros farm in Celeryville during the break. The season before my freshman year was my first job. My first checks were $15 per 40 hour week and Saturday mornings. That summer, the federal minimum increased and I was raised to $45. The ready acceptance of Carol and Brendas little sister by the experienced workers, I suppose gave me some pseudo confidence for the next years in school. The money also raised my socioeconomic level. My clothes matched that of other girls.
Somewhere during my sophomore year, I met Chris through Arlene, I guess. We had a study hall together and did go to some ball games together. Once, I went to her house and we listened to music-the Stone Ponies singing Different Drum. Arlene had moved past us. She had a steady boyfriend. I saw her in classes and lunch but her focus was on the boy.
During junior and senior year, Arlene and Chris began attending the Vocational School in Shelby to study cosmetology. Several of those first mornings of school, I tried to talk with them, but they had already moved on. And I adjusted again with Carol and Suzan and Ruth.
Years later I ran into Arlene after she married a Smith guy and attended our New Haven church. And Chris and I reconnected when she worked at a local flower shop. They were simple chats but a reconnection still that remained and for me came to fruition at yesterdays meeting. Years of life have come and gone for me, but the occasional thought of how they must have really liked something about me have helped sustain a life. Friendship increases in value with time. Truth. I am glad that Arlene and Chris and I can laugh together in this age.
3/27/14
Yesterday I traveled to Lodi Ohio with Chris to meet Arlene for lunch. Both are high school friends that I have been in contact with occasionally since graduation. Our friendship was centered over our freshman and sophomore years.
After 6th grade at Steuben school, all the outlying students went to junior high at the high school on split sessions until the new junior high was completed. We were outsiders to town kids already familiar with each other and knew the established social hierarchy. My sixth grade friends were spread out over different class groups I now realized were arranged due to scholastic achievement. My best friend soon found a new town friend and was able to acclimate to the new surroundings. I think I never did. I don't remember any friends from 7th or 8th grade. My life was secret and I kept to myself for survival. Those memories are cold and gray and alone among the class mates who had money and privilege and made fun of my speech and my clothes and lack of social knowledge. The thing that saved me then was that I was smarter than most of them. And I had a family to go home to for awhile.
As a freshman, I remember that Arlene and I met in Mrs. Rineharts Algebra class and ate lunch together. After eating, we cruised the halls, flirting with boys we passed and those we could see through classroom door windows. In the winter, I did go to a few basketball games with her and did stay overnite once at her home on Ash St. My sisters could drive and thus I was able go to some school events. My parents both worked second shift at Pioneer Rubber and with one car, we were severely limited in after school and other social activities. Arlene never stayed the night with me. I knew my home was different from hers and was afraid of being judged again and maybe losing her friendship.
Anyway, the school year ended and we didn't see anyone from school over the summer. I worked at Holthouse Bros farm in Celeryville during the break. The season before my freshman year was my first job. My first checks were $15 per 40 hour week and Saturday mornings. That summer, the federal minimum increased and I was raised to $45. The ready acceptance of Carol and Brendas little sister by the experienced workers, I suppose gave me some pseudo confidence for the next years in school. The money also raised my socioeconomic level. My clothes matched that of other girls.
Somewhere during my sophomore year, I met Chris through Arlene, I guess. We had a study hall together and did go to some ball games together. Once, I went to her house and we listened to music-the Stone Ponies singing Different Drum. Arlene had moved past us. She had a steady boyfriend. I saw her in classes and lunch but her focus was on the boy.
During junior and senior year, Arlene and Chris began attending the Vocational School in Shelby to study cosmetology. Several of those first mornings of school, I tried to talk with them, but they had already moved on. And I adjusted again with Carol and Suzan and Ruth.
Years later I ran into Arlene after she married a Smith guy and attended our New Haven church. And Chris and I reconnected when she worked at a local flower shop. They were simple chats but a reconnection still that remained and for me came to fruition at yesterdays meeting. Years of life have come and gone for me, but the occasional thought of how they must have really liked something about me have helped sustain a life. Friendship increases in value with time. Truth. I am glad that Arlene and Chris and I can laugh together in this age.
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